Monday, June 28, 2010

Tidbits of Zambian Life

I've tried to pry myself out of bed early to go running. This is no easier here than it ever has been for me, and more often than not I reset my alarm for a more reasonable hour. When my willingness to leave my warm bed matches my ambition to run, I am never disappointed. Its almost like trail running. My feet certainly don't know the difference. Running along the di rt 'sidewalks' which the rainy season has transformed into gullies or gutters, jumping over the small potholes, and through the larger ones; maneuvering over roots and over trash, trying to focus on the flowers in the trees and the colors of the dawn clouds without loosing my footing. If it weren't for the semi-paved roads, smoke-belching cars, and shanty-town sprawl, could you forgive me for picturing the same dirt trail winding through a colorful mountain meadow?


People tend to look at me intently when I'm running, more so than they look at me normally. What could be mistaken for a scowl accompanies a stare that lacks understanding. Is it because they don't see Mzungu's (nyanja for white man) running down the street - I know that's not true. Is it because I'm in shorts and a T-shirt? Is it because I'm sweating like mad in shorts and a T-shirt, while they are bundled in jackets, scarves and hats in the depth of Zambian winter? Or instead is the look more insidious - a walking dollar sign? an imperialist invader? Usually a simple 'good morning' is all it takes to disarm the scowl and win a smile.


There is an abandoned minivan parked alongside a number of junked cars outside the market by my office. This van must have a special significance, however, because there are never less than 5 people inside. The van has no tires and no windows. Sitting on chalks, empty boxes and discarded wrappers spill out the doorways and windows onto the surrounding dirt and nearby vehicles. Music blares from somewhere - could it possibly be that the stereo still works? A raucous crowd inhabits the van, from morning until night, joking, laughing, staring at passersby.


Despite the dirt roads and sidewalks, everyone goes to work in suits or business attire, their shoes spotless and shiny. It took me a few days to figure out that everyone carries a rag to wipe the dirt off their shoes after reaching their destination.


If you are the only person taking a taxi, you sit in the passenger seat and strike up a conversation. Often, the first destination is the gas station. Whether or not you pay for the few liters of gas that go into the car is irrelevant, there is no apparent need to have the taxi gassed and ready to go. I've also never been in a taxi where the fuel needle isn't on empty, or where the driver puts in more than five or six liters at a time.


There are vendors that walk down the sides and middle of the streets at busy intersections - hawking everything from bootleg DVDs to cell phone chargers, maps of Africa to fresh fruit. The other day one of the vendors passed trying to sell slingshots. What?! I asked my Zambian compatriot what for? 'To rob you man!' I had my doubts - the very next vendor walked by selling machetes, the next, dish soap.


Clothes need to be ironed here. All of them. Sheets, towels, jeans, socks - yep. Otherwise - fly larvae could burrow under your skin and lay their eggs. After a few weeks and a nasty painful zit - a fly emerges and takes off! At first I thought it a wives tale told to foreigners and children - but no - the stories (and pictures...) have convinced me otherwise! Google 'Tumbu fly images' to see for yourself, if you dare...




Friday, June 4, 2010

'Major' Inconvenience

The 'inconveniences' here compared to the Western world pose occasional challenges. Every so often the hot water decides to stop being hot. Sometimes there is no water altogether. Well, if you know me at all, showers are over-rated and I constantly search for an excuse to drink beer rather than water anyways. As far as electricity goes, its a sign if important buildings have imposing looking generators outside that look like they've been needed once or twice. Really, these aren't inconveniences at all, they are the side effects of being incredibly fortunate. The majority of the country, both inside and outside the capital, faces much more than 'inconveniences' when it comes to water and power.

I've been trained to handle the outages of internet, and the painfully slow internet when it actually is available. Remember, I was weaned on dial-up. The fact that my parents graduated from dial-up not two months ago may hint at a strain of Luddite somewhere in my blood... I was spoiled by living with a beer connoisseur and dating a fantastic cook. The roosters that crow early in the morning and the neighbor's dogs who bark incessantly throughout the night give an essence of farm life that isn't too far down the street. Each of these minor inconveniences are friendly reminders that I'm no longer in Kansas, Toto.

There is one thing, however, that drives me crazy.

The subtle afterthought that gnaws at my soul, saps my patience, and feels like some sort of Chinese torture trick ... is my sink. It has a hot water tap on one side of the sink and a cold water tap on the other side of the sink. Let me repeat that, which, to the casual reader, who may never have experienced such a monstrosity, may sound completely benign. On one end of the sink, there is one faucet that only spouts scalding hot water. At the far, far, opposite end of the sink, is the other faucet, out of which flows only frigid cold water. The water on one side is hot enough to boil pasta. The water at the other end causes goose-bumps. Have you ever tried to wash your face with such a device? It must be a riddle, or some form of a practical joke. You have to cup the cold water in your hands, add a dabble of hot water that is too hot to touch without any cold water, but the cold water is mostly gone from your hands by the time you have gotten it over to the hot water side of the sink - ah, as you can tell, its exasperating. Well, I would think it were quaint and kind of funny - if I hadn't seen anything like it before...


I know exactly where this absurd twist on a normal bathroom appliance it came from: England. I had the same idiotic sink in my dormitory room in England. Of all the perils of colonization, the double faucet sink has to be up there on the list.