Is it?!!

"What is this number here?"
"Well, it is the total monthly data usage."
"Oh, so it should be a sum of each of the connection usages in this column?"
"Yes."
"Well the numbers don't add up."
"Is it!?" (A current Zambianism meaning, huh, well I'll be.)
"Um, it isn't. (not knowing exactly how to respond, taking the statement literally). No, I mean, it is. Wait, it isn't - ah, this column doesn't add up to this number here."
"Is it... How many times did you add up the numbers?"
"I didn't add them by hand. I used some software to import the numbers and do the addition for me."
"Oh. I wasn't prepared to talk about this during this meeting. Maybe we can reschedule and I can make sure to have someone that can answer these questions present."

In Zambia, confrontation in social situations is avoided at all cost. Constructive criticism is often taken to be insulting or disrespectful. Hierarchy is based on age, not necessarily merit (or even better, political or family ties). As a result, I tried to be on my best behavior for the meeting, especially given the circumstances. Patience, kemosabe.

"You have a few hundred people working in this building, surely one of them can take a few minutes to help us."
"Um, I don't know, I'm afraid we will have to reschedule."
"Can you please see if there is someone that can help us?"
"Um, please wait here. Do you mind if I take this paper with your notes?"
"Sure - if that helps."

I'm looking at the cell bill for our project for the last month - covering 24 Community Health Worker phones and 9 data modems in Clinics and District Offices. Its well over our projected, let alone budgeted costs - enough that its raising more than eyebrows. Upon investigation of the bill - one discrepancy leads to another. This column of data used per 'session' doesn't add up to the total 'data volume' charge for the month. November charges appear again on the December bill - but not for the same amount. The daily charge for a single sim card for November 10th on the November bill shows a different number of connections and data pushed through each connection than November 10th on the December bill. Oh, and they aren't charging us the way they had advertised when we signed up for the contract. Apparently charges by data volume come with a hidden minimum charge each connection. In rural locations where the cell network can be spotty, especially when trying to send moderate amounts of data, connections are dropped all the time. How often does your network drop a call? And are you located in rural Africa? A flurry of useless emails with the cell provider and more wasted time led to the need for a face to face meeting.

(doo doo do do, doo doo do (think Jeopardy)... 40 minutes later... our old friend and a new guy sit down with us. Introductions proceed apace (usually the first 5 or so minutes of each conversation).
"Oh.. well.. it appears that our software isn't doing something right. We will need to look into it. We are terribly embarassed, especially that the customer pointed this out to us, rather than our internal quality control. We will send you our data so you can see exactly where our reports are coming from. We will also send you a revised bill tomorrow."

The data never comes.
That promised email is never sent.
Upon inquiry 4 days later, we recieve a cryptic email that basically says:
We will charge you whatever we think we can get away with. Most customers don't complain. Our system is good enough to be able to double charge you for usage in the previous month because it wasn't 'tallied' correctly the first time. As to the fuzzy math, well, we use it to our advantage.

Is it?! It is.

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